I’m sure some people will understand the allusion. Others may think I’m communicating like Yuri. It’s a kind of joke really: a broom is a tool for creating sweeping generalizations.
Who are you calling bland, buster?
Never mind that, let’s begin at the beginning.
The OP Steam date is 22 March 2018. The VN debuted on Steam on 22 September 2017. What took you so long?
OP opens with context: creepypasta, reddit, title, main character, dark truth, video game, twist, obvious. That’s this game and its subculture summed up.
That last sentence is “where’s the meat” and the rest is empty calories.
Then we have a ramble about internet fandom, some other game, a metaphor about fans. The Steam awards … GMod won over DDLC … people weren’t jokey-mad … and a fair few black heart emojis along the way.
And we finally have a clearcut fact: because, GMod is a game and DDLC is a visual novel. Which he immediately became blind to. And then, it’s really ♥♥♥♥ing gay to see people insult this game … (his). More ~ emoji. And … (about DDLC) … “where you sit and click for 4 hours, and then get jumpscared … and more ♥♥♥♥♥♥ …
If it took you four hours to finish Act One, you’re a palooka. The average playthrough to the special ending is four hours.
Finally! … the actual “EXPERIENCE” of something or other.
three consecutive “trigre!!111” warnings
front page of the ♥♥♥♥ing game has a “pyschological horror” tag,
the “dakr plott” of said game being crammed down your tiny dickhole,
I managed to dodge these spoilers for the sole purpose of having a fair and clean experience.
It wasn’t worth it.
Then he mentions jumpscares for whatever reason, describes his mode of play: it starts out normal, you sit there clicking rapidly, and continues at length to misanalyze character emotional state and yours. He has a swipe at fans. Yair, 3 million strong last time I saw download numbers ‘and they all act as one.’ Yep. Sweep, sweep, sweep.
… and “you have to restart the game. And all you do is click, and you KEEP ♥♥♥♥ING CLICKING until more glitch effects, blah blah, I can’t really remember much because I was half-asleep at this point,” …
At this point???
There’s a lot more summary and confusion and a bad ending. I think. Who knows. I can’t take any more. This is worse than being abused by my papa. (And if you believe that porker, I hear Monika has a bridge to sell.)